Life With….

I enjoy entertaining and in an ideal world would do so frequently.  I have thrown Christmas parties,  yearly for almost a decade, throw dinner parties at least twice a season (except I have not thrown one this fall yet) and basically enjoying organizing events with others.   This is an odd part of my personality as it completely contradicts the part enjoys holing up for an entire weekend with a great set of books or movies (see my constantly evolving reading lists and an upcoming post on my current tv obsession  Friday Night Lights).

But I have found it almost pointless to throw events as planning has become next to impossible.  This is because many people I know consistently breach one important etiquette protocol – they do not reply.

I know that etiquette may seem outdated, and as often as I agree, in many cases it is necessary.  For example, I hate writing thank you notes for Christmas and other gifts but I do it.  I know many do not.  But I doubt that anyone ignores writing thank you notes for  a job interview.

I do not pretend to return every call or reply to every email – but I do try to respond, especially if an actual request for attendance is involved.  To do otherwise would not allow the host to plan.  There is a huge difference between events for 2, 5, 10, 20, 60, and 100 and the host needs to know what ballpark the game it is.  The smaller number of invitees the more important an accurate count is – compare cooking for three and cooking for seven, especially if the seven includes at least three males.

More people means more food, wine, and expenses are invovled, and therefore more planning, and more time.

The customs of etiquette arose for a reason; they are important and not to be ignored.  I know that this a topic I will return to, because as old and conservative as it may make me appear, it is important.  A person who refuses to reply quickly becomes disfavored – either ignored or bitched out as they wreak havoc on my plans.  I can accept a heartfelt apology for not replying, but I would hope that people would only not RSVP with good reason; to do otherwise shows a lack of concern for others.

I close by quoting from an email I recently sent a friend  I hope this shows the importance I place on this issue.

“When we spoke last friday you were 100% committed; I had been toying with going to Florida, but upon hearing I had a taker for the mtns I decided not to go.  Additionally, I now cannot cancel the trip, as I normally would without any takers, because I have to take Algy out there and leave him – as my mom is watching him to while I am in DC.  If I had known this yesterday, I could have arranged for the vet to watch him.
I guess all I am saying, is that you need to remember people make plans based on what you tell them or don’t tell them.  That is why it is important to a) let people know an answer when they send and invitation to things and b) let people know as soon as possible when plans change.

I don’t mean to lecture, sorry, but this is a huge pet peeve of mine.”

All text and copyrights preserved by the author 02csb For more information visit http://www.peebesalgy.com Courtney Brown

Create Your Badge  All text and copyrights preserved by the author for words and original pictures and may not be used without author's permission. For more information visit http://www.peebesalgy.com Follow me on Twitter @ http://twitter.com/peebesalgy or contact me directly through http://www.peebesalgy.com/blog/contact-me/ Courtney Brown | Create Your Badge